My Blog Story: Why I Started a Lifestyle Blog
Happy Monday, friends! For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been working on a complete website re-brand. From my colors, logo, aesthetics, down to re-purposing this lil’ brand of mine. I used to write and host my website for my Life Coaching business, but that’s no longer my sole focus (yes, Life Coaching is still in the plans for me! I’m just re-prioritizing right now and taking referrals only). But in today’s post I thought I’d share how I got here and why I started my Life and Style Blog: Authentically Avery!
Where it all began: my first blog
I first started blogging in 2017, my senior year of college. I was wrapping up what felt like the worst year of my life. I was going through bouts of depression and issues with self-worth, due to relationship insecurities and family issues that tore me apart.
After I publicly shared my testimony with domestic violence (unrelated to issues mentioned above), the only desire I had was to share my story with others. Hence the birth of my blog’s name, “Strength Over Silence (#SOS)”. During this time, my blog posts consisted of self-help, encouragement, and was a reflection of my healing process. It was the perfect outlet. It gave me purpose being able to help others while helping myself. In 2018, I wanted to expand its reach to help more women personally. I then slowly converted Strength Over Silence into a women’s community and brand that still exists today! A year later, we started hosting women’s events locally. I had so many big dreams for this community (and still do!). But then the COVID-19 pandemic hit, and changed the trajectory of everything (on a personal and global level). Being on lockdown for a couple of months in our homes due to the virus, I was forced to take a step back from everything and re-evaluate my priorities and my path.
One day (in June 2020), I remember breaking down, feeling so overwhelmed and burnt out. I knew something about the journey I was on felt inauthentic. I had to come to terms with my urge for control, and was forced to let go of things I was holding onto. I felt like I outgrew old passions and hobbies, and it took a pandemic for me to see it. I mean, there’s nothing I love more than what God has done through my previous blog. But I finally understood something I was oblivious to before: I’m not the same person I was when I started this blog. And that is okay. This blog helped me through my healing, but once I took a step back, I saw how much I would cling to it. It felt limiting to my personality. Of course, centering your thoughts and words around healing and deep stories eventually feels too heavy to carry, especially in a new season of growth. I knew I had confirmation that it was time to step back.
I should also note a vulnerable truth I’ve had to come to terms with in the last year: I’m a perfectionist to a fault, and it is crippling. It keeps me hidden and afraid to let my true self shine. Part of me believes that I hid behind my blog, #SOS, because it was safe and something I attached to because it was easy.
CHASING CURIOSITY INSTEAD OF PASSION
I was desperate for my own creative outlet. One where I could express all of the little things that make me…me!
Since the pandemic, I’ve been working hard to recover from my perfectionism. And during the first few months of 2020, I felt creatively frustrated, and that I had all of this energy bottled up inside that I wasn’t expressing, and didn’t really know (creatively) where to start. My goal this year was to I focus on letting go of everything—my inhibitions, outdated beliefs, habits & hobbies, and basically start from scratch. And I did just that. I experimented and tried new things.
Being furloughed during the pandemic, I wanted to make extra money. My grandmother mentioned it to me before, so I started by selling clothes on eBay and Poshmark! I finally had the time to give it a shot. I saw money roll in almost right away, and became more engaged with the kind of trends, styles, and brands I was selling. I LOVED it. It felt so rewarding, and I worked hard.
At this same time, I still wanted to write and do something creative. So I created a new Instagram account to test out an impulsive idea I had of starting “Authentically Avery” as a coaching “blog/brand” with my own name behind it. I didn’t follow many people, and aimed to keep it a little more secretive until I really knew my intentions or goal. But it ended up being less about coaching, and more about sharing personal stories. I mean, I’m really glad I took this route! It created zero obligation on my end to keep up with it, and made it more pleasurable and less goal-oriented. If you’re ever on the fence about something and want to give it a try, I recommend dipping your toes in the water one step at a time, instead of diving in head first!
No Forcing. Just Flowin’.
Anyway, in my free time, I started watching bloggers’ stories to stay updated on the latest trends for my resell shop. I never really cared for staying up-to-date with bloggers before, because I saw blogging as something “everyone was doing” and that turned me away. But slowly, my curiosity for style blogging grew. And it grew even more when I had seen my close friend Lauren occasionally promoting her style through the LIKEtoKNOW.it app! She’s inspiring, give her a follow! (@xoxo_laurenreed4).
The idea of creating a lifestyle blog scared the crap out of me. I’ve never done anything like this, at least not my own brand with my face behind it. AKA a reflection of ME…yikes! Of course I wrestled with the whole—“What experience do I even have? What will other people think? What if I don’t follow through with it? Everyone’s going to judge me.“
Ultimately, what I keep coming back to, even after my doubt & self-questioning, is that my desire for a passionate and fulfilling life is greater than my need to please, or my perfectionism that tries to keep me playing small.
So, I finally said why not?! I knew my fear wasn’t going to just go away. But I knew the first way to get rid of my fear is to welcome it and step into it.
Now, I’m able to implement both my love for personal growth AND implement my love for affordable fashion, by helping others feel confident in who they are, on the inside and out!
It has completely taken the pressure off of the heaviness I felt when I was limited to writing articles of healing for my previous blog. Now with a lifestyle blog, I feel like I can write about anything that inspires me, including growth + healing! This has given me the freedom to build a life where I feel like I can express myself uniquely, sharing things I love and hopefully inspiring others to do the same!
Thank you to everyone who has been sticking with me through my non-linear, crazy journey. There have been times when I’ve felt all over the place, and times when I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. I wouldn’t be here without Jesus guiding me through, or without my friends, family, and a community that supports + interacts with me and shares similar experiences! Thank you all so so much!
xo, Avery
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Hi, I’m Avery!
I share all things affordable style, decor, life advice, creative biz tips, or pieces of my story (even the not-so-pretty moments). In all I do, I aim to keep it real. Ultimately, I hope this is a space that leaves you feeling inspired to live brightly + confidently, on the inside and out!